Fearless Writing Challenge; Day 41: If I Was a Cat and Had 9 Lives

[note: harvested from my journal circa 2008]  how many lives would I have to live to do all the things I would have liked to do? International class track athlete: Paris, Oslo, Bislet, Eugene. Trainers, coaches, agents, Athletes’ Village. Injuries, ice, sponsorships, qualifying times. Single girl in the Big CIty: writer, temp, model, girlfriend, mistress. New […]

Fearless Writing Challenge, Day 40: I Thought I Was Drowning.

  I wrote this in a past life. It hurts me to read it again, to go back there. Even in my darkest days now, I am not even close to feeling as lost and alone as I did then. It is good for me to recognize that truth. What follows is one scene from an unhappy […]

Day 11: An Angry Breakthrough

  The other day (Day 11, or 10, f*** it, I don’t even know at this point) I was driving and felt a wave of anger and exasperation overtake me. Hold on, ’cause I’m about to share it with you. [Warning: Bad words may be used.] I realized that holding on to this B.S. about […]

Fearless Seekers: Are You With Me?

I have spent thousands of dollars trying to figure out what my purpose is, what my “gift” to the world could possibly be. Is it to teach mindfulness?  Or to teach writing?  Is it to help others learn resilience? Or to discover and follow their dreams?  Should I package it all together and lead retreats? […]

Learned Fearlessness

If you’ve ever taken a psychology class you’ve probably heard about Martin Seligman’s theory of learned helplessness. Essentially, the idea is that over time, if one experiences painful events that are out of one’s control, eventually one stops even trying to avoid the incident. Characteristics of learned helplessness include decreased motivation and negative emotions like sadness […]

This Time Last Year or An Appreciation of Progress

I just got back from my second barre class. You’re supposed to feel like this: But I feel like this: Yes, that is a sloth climbing a tree. Seriously guys, within 5 minutes I am dripping sweat and within 20 I am nauseous and looking at the clock to see how much longer I have until the […]